Ah yes, this is the season when much time is spent with family and friends. As much joy as this brings I noticed how often the groups I am with begin an age old ritual of joining together to laugh . . .at someone else! Bashing the one member of the group or family that is not present is essential. But, it could be a political joining together. And boy that can be an ugly experience. Or it could be just a lighthearted rancor at the unpopular football team being watched.
When I realized I was often laughing at a truly funny joke, but it was at someone else’s expense I began analyzing what was going on. So, I went back to all those years studying and teaching “A Course in Miracles” to understand this insidiously compelling need we all see to have, and might I say, enjoy? That brought me to a section I wrote in “Sacred Steps” on opening the heart chakra.
Below you will find a little something to help you through those times when bashing others seems to be the only way to get a laugh, or sympathy or somehow prove you are right and are with the ‘in’ group. Happily there is another way to enjoy those times, too.
(reprinted from “Sacred Steps” seen in the column to the left)
Healing your Heart Chakra
Lowering the Walls of Guilt, Fear and Anger
Health, a main aspect of the issues attached to the Heart Portal of Power, refers to the wholeness that occurs when you feel one with everyone and everything. The main stumbling block to health, therefore, will be the walls you place between you and others, between you and the world, between you and God and between you and yourself! The building blocks which form the foundation of this wall are the emotions of guilt, fear and anger. Many believe that they experience only one of these emotions at any time and are free from the others. Not so! When you feel unworthy (guilt) you fear rejection (fear of punishment) and attempt to redirect the punishment by proving another’s guilt (this coping technique is called anger). Thus the Deadly Cycle of all three emotions is in play. By recognizing the full dynamic at work in yourself, you begin the process of lowering your walls and becoming whole once more.
Forgiving Yourself and Others
Are you willing to let go of your judgments about others, the world and yourself? Until you are, you will keep the ramparts around yourself high and strong, removing yourself from healing However, when you are ready to say to yourself, “Maybe I am wrong, and there is another way of seeing this,” then the process of forgiveness can begin. Forgiveness brings a release from pain and does not include self-punishment as an attempt at correction. When you can humbly remove your stubborn desire to see wrong in others, you will be surprised at how quickly your mind will be filled with a compassion that is both powerful and healing.
As you open and cleanse the Heart Portal of Power you are asking to be shown those areas of your life where you have been too stubborn to release judgments. Now is the time when you can continue to allow real healing to be expressed in and through you by your willingness to be shown anew with open heart and mind.
Love blesses the progress you are making and the gift of appreciation you give yourself and the world as you lower the barriers to guilt, fear and anger and replace them with the Healing Cycle of innocence, safety and forgiveness.